Have you ever wondered what it would be like to have Bon Jovi play at your birthday party? Or have Justin Timberlake emcee your wedding? Or have Creed play at your housewarming shindig? Just kidding. That's not a thing people say.
Citing an anonymous source, Priceonomics published the booking fees for hundreds of acts, ranging from Madonna ($1 million and up) to Tori Amos ($50,000-$100,000) to Alien Ant Farm (a somewhat surprising $10,000-$20,000). Though the data-crawling website does note that the lists came from a college booking company, which inherently drives up the overall price, it's interesting to see what tier your favorite musician falls into.
So who's at the top? Bruce Springsteen, Bon Jovi, Madonna, Dave Matthews Band (remember, this is a college booking company), Justin Bieber, Justin Timberlake, James Taylor and Taylor Swift all command at least a cool million. Lady Gaga and Adele are right behind, with a starting fee of $750,000.
As much as it's a lesson in rock 'n' roll economics, this list also provides important insight into who is still performing. Remember Blessid Union of Souls? They're still around, and you can pay them to play your next party starting at $5,000, which — on this list at least — is next to nothing. But because these numbers are likely inflated, you could probably just offer them a pizza and unlimited use of your laptop before their concert in lieu of a performance fee.
Among the Texas acts highlighted are Miranda Lambert, Jessica Simpson and Kelly Clarkson, all of whom command a base fee of $150,000. Willie Nelson's is a little less, coming in at $100,000.
In upsetting news, Rob Thomas commands the same booking fee as Nelson. Rob Thomas! Noticeably absent from the list is Beyoncé. It should really come as no surprise, because you can't put a price on perfection.