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    Let Me Sum Up

    We're totally gonna secede, y'all! Plus: White men are screwed and Troy Aikmanstays put

    Eric Celeste
    Nov 13, 2012 | 9:37 am
    • I'm 100 percent sure she signed the petition. And she lives in Texas. And has anawful Chinese tat.
      Tshirtwatch.com
    • Oh, and secession isn’t going to happen. Ever. Never ever ever.
      CC Rogers/Flickr Creative Commons
    • The most interesting story about Texas yesterday was written by Ryan Lizza ofThe New Yorker, who hangs with new U.S. Senator-elect Ted Cruz.
      Tedcruz.org
    • Troy Aikman's manse is really off the market.
      Photo courtesy of Allie Beth Allman

    Editor’s note: Eric Celeste, whose name has appeared on the masthead of damn near every publication in Dallas, puts yesterday’s headlines and today’s discussions into context in his new daily column. Plus he throws in some ’80s music references and movie quotes — hence the name, Let Me Sum Up. It’s a one-stop morning meal for what Dallas is and should be talking about.

    I get it. It’s a cute story. About 60,000 idiots out of a state with 25 million people sign a petition asking President Obama to allow Texas to secede. Newsrooms across North Texas monitoring Twitter (because, you know, that’s what passes for news judgment now) collectively break out in a Gangnam-Style flashmob. “Pageviews! We’re gonna get pageviews! And we don’t even have to feel conflicted about it because it’s real news!”

    Then the governor comments to make it official: this is Big News. Journalism, back on solid ground.

    Sure. Whatever. I mean, we have no way of knowing how many of these 60,000 who “signed” the petition are actually from Texas. Even if every single person is really from our state, that represents less than 1 percent of the Dallas-Fort Worth area. Oh, and secession isn’t going to happen. Ever. Never ever ever.

    Don’t trust me. Trust fivethirtyeight.com blogger and noted looper Nate Silver, who said so three years ago in D:

    Texas has no more and no less right to secede than any of the other 49 states. The federal government profits from Texas — collecting more in tax revenues than it gives back in services — and it would never be allowed to secede.

    The really interesting proposition, Silver wrote (in great detail), would be for Texas to divide into five states, not to secede from the union. I differ in one respect: I would not have called the new North Texas state Trinity, but The Considerant, after the Frenchman who established the La Reunion socialist commune in what is now West Dallas. But that’s just me. I also like .38 Special. (1.7 million views! Let’s start our own country!)

    He was joking, but it at least it was funny — unlike the BS petition we all read about yesterday.

    Elsewhere

    The most interesting story about Texas yesterday was, not surprisingly, written by Ryan Lizza of The New Yorker. Lizza hangs with new U.S. Senator-elect Ted Cruz, who worries openly about his party’s ability to reach Hispanics — and by reach, I mean “in a manner that doesn’t suggest deportation” — and who says Texas could turn blue very quickly if the GOP doesn’t become more welcoming on border and immigration issues.

    The DMN, meanwhile, just says DEMS STILL SUCK!

    Paul Burka of TexMo took a different lesson from the election, suggesting new State Senator Wendy Davis is exactly the sort of candidate the state GOP should fear.

    Jim Schutze of the Dallas Observer thinks white men are screwed. Not if Facebook has anything to say about it, Jim!

    Candice Carlisle of the DBJ reported that Troy Aikman’s house is off the market, just as Candy Evans suspected.

    Melissa Repko has a very nice piece in the DMN talking to the parents of the alleged rape victim from Highland Park, detailing how they think the social media ugliness should serve as a call to parents to better educate their kids about date rape.

    Meanwhile, Eric Nicholson at Unfair Park jumps all up in Kidd Kraddick’s grill for his morning show’s attempt at roofie humor.

    Lance Murray says Irving-based Hostess might shut down plants. Oh God no, said the two stoners who heard their moms mention the news to their friends.

    Dallas ISD president Mike Miles has a new chief of staff, the guy who used to work for the president of Lamar University, who has a son who accidentally blew up a gas station. You’ll have to trust me on that.

    Retweets

    Pete Delkus, Channel 8 weatherman, later said he nearly fell over when he heard this question on air. Agree! TV news’s demise is LOL!

    Have you ever been tempted to cheat with a co-worker? That's our instant poll question on the 5pm news.

    — Pete Delkus (@wfaaweather) November 12, 2012

    Mike Hashimoto, DMN editorial and bicep-curl star, wonders how much military planning Gen. John Allen did while also writing/reading the 20,000-30,000 documents passed between he and Jill Kelley. Love disrupts the time-space continuum, Mike. You get more done!

    Idle question: Who has time to write or read 30k pages of email over two years? m.washingtonpost.com/world/national…

    — Mike Hashimoto (@MikeHashimoto) November 13, 2012

    Gordon Keith shares a pic of UT’s biggest fan. Ewww.

    The Disturbing Pic of Matthew McConaughey wp.me/pTYG-1KK

    — Gordon Keith (@gordonkeith) November 13, 2012

    I feel you, Evan Grant.

    This is what we've become as journalists, begging for credit on "breaking" a story on Twitter deadsp.in/RRjcgl

    — Evan Grant (@Evan_P_Grant) November 13, 2012

    WTFU

    Today’s musical send-off. From the New Frontiers, the defunct-yet-still-great DFW band. P.S. It’s good to be back.

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    Pestilence News

    New invasive pest in Texas is destroying grasses and pasture

    Teresa Gubbins
    Dec 12, 2025 | 10:14 am
    Mealyworm
    TAMU
    Mealyworm is small but damaging.

    Texas Agriculture Commissioner Sid Miller has issued an urgent alert to farmers to inspect their pastures for a newly detected and highly damaging pest: the pasture mealybug (Helicococcus summervillei).

    According to a release from the Department of Agriculture (TDA), this invasive species, never before reported in North America, has been confirmed in multiple Texas counties and is already causing significant damage to pasture acreage across the southeast portion of the state.

    The pasture mealybug causes “pasture dieback,” leaving expanding patches of yellowing, weakened, and ultimately dead turf.

    This pest was first detected in Australia in 1928; its first detection in the Western Hemisphere occurred in the Caribbean between 2019 and 2020.

    The TDA is working with Texas A&M AgriLife Extension and USDA’s Animal and Plant Health Inspection Service (APHIS) to coordinate a rapid response and protect Texas producers.

    Mealybug history
    Although the mealybug is just now being spotted, researchers suspect it may have been introduced before 2022.

    Since mid-April 2025, southern Texas pasture and hay producers have been reporting problems in their fields. These fields show grass patches becoming brown or necrotic, or patches that are completely dead. Originally, it was presumed that symptoms were caused by another mealybug called the Rhodes grass mealybug, which has been reported in the U.S. since 1942. However, further investigations confirm that it's this new pasture mealybug (Heliococcus summervillei).

    It has devastated millions of acres of grazing land in Australia and has since spread globally. Its rapid reproduction, hidden soil-level feeding, and broad host range make it a significant threat to pasture health and livestock operations.

    Mealybug MealybugTAMU

    Adult females are approximately 2-5 mm long, covered in a white, waxy coating. They are capable of producing nearly 100 offspring within 24 hours, resulting in several generations per season. While adult females can live for up to 100 days, most damage is inflicted by the youngest nymphs, which feed on plant sap and inject toxic saliva that causes grass to yellow, weaken, and die.

    “This is a completely new pest to our continent, and Texas is once again on the front lines,” Commissioner Miller says. “If the pasture mealybug spreads across Texas grazing lands like it has in eastern Australia, it could cost Texas agriculture dearly in lost productivity and reduced livestock capacity. TDA is working hand-in-hand with federal and university partners to respond swiftly and protect our producers from this unprecedented threat.”

    Houston has a problem
    The estimated impact area currently covers 20 counties, primarily in the Houston area, including: Cameron, Hidalgo, Willacy, Refugio, Calhoun, Victoria, Goliad, Dewitt, Lavaca, Fayette, Jackson, Matagorda, Brazoria, Galveston, Wharton, Colorado, Austin, Washington, Burleson, Brazos, and Robertson. AgriLife entomologists have submitted a formal Pest Incident Worksheet documenting significant damage to pastures and hayfields in Victoria County.

    Research trials are underway to determine the best integrated pest management options. Currently, there is no known effective labeled insecticide for pasture mealybug.

    Affected plants include: Bermudagrass, Bahia grass, Johnsongrass, hay grazer (sorghum–sudangrass), St. Augustine grass, various bluestem species, and other tropical or subtropical grasses. Damage can occur in leaves, stems, and roots.

    Symptoms:


    • Yellowing and discoloration of leaves within a week of infestation
    • Purpling or reddening of foliage
    • Stunted growth and drought stress despite rainfall
    • Poorly developed root systems
    • Dieback starting at leaf tips and progressing downward
    • Premature aging, making plants more vulnerable to pathogens
    How to spot it
    • Scout regularly for mealybugs on grass leaves, stems, soil surface, leaf litter, and under cow patties
    • Focus on unmanaged areas such as fence lines, ungrazed patches, and roadsides
    • Look for fluffy, white, waxy, or “fuzzy” insects on blades and stems
    • If plants appear unhealthy and insects match this description, investigate further

    “Early identification is critical, and we need every producer’s eyes on the ground,” Commissioner Miller added. “We are working diligently with our federal and state partners to determine how to best combat this novel threat and stop it in its tracks.”

    If you observe suspicious symptoms or insects matching the descriptions above, contact TDA at 1-800-TELL-TDA immediately.

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