A Very Dallas Halloween
Finding the right Halloween costume can be as difficult as hugging a mongoose. It has to be creative while still ensuring that people know what you’re supposed to be. And, ideally, you’d like to not spend a paycheck making it happen.
To keep this holiday local and fun, we’ve come up with a few ideas for costumes that turn you into some of our most iconic Dallasites.
Burning Big Tex costumes are so 2012. But dressing up as a cowboy is pretty easy, and if you’re not very big, then you get “haha irony” points. For this year’s edition, in remembrance of the hidden (but not really) new Tex, put a frame of PVC pipes on your shoulders, hang a sheet around it so nobody can see you and try not to bump into everything. It helps if you show up to the party an hour before it starts.
The Dallas Cowboys are proving that even when they’re entertaining (or frustrating, like in the game against Detroit), they’ll still be mediocre. A vanilla 4-4 record is a perfect fit for head coach Jason Garrett. Put on a Cowboys mock turtleneck, a headset and stand to the side of a party for three hours without changing your expression.
John Tesar, the celebrity chef that’s so hot right now thanks to Spoon restaurant in Preston Center, is as well known for his … passion as he is for his food. Grab a chef’s coat, some thick-rimmed glasses and rest them on your forehead. Carry some tomatoes around and squash them up whenever someone says hey to you.
Sean Lowe and Catherine Giudici
The bachelor and his winning lady are getting married on January 26, 2014, which would put them in the minority for The Bachelor couples. We think the crazy kids will make it. For Sean, become 6-foot-3 and jacked, so your custom-tailored suit looks sharp. For Catherine, straighten your hair until every strand is uniformly in place, throw on a tight dress and giggle a lot. Have a friend follow you around, filming everything you do. Take time every now and again to turn to the camera and mention that you think you’ve found the love of your life.
Although Cubes is rarely out of the news for long, his recent win against the SEC showed the ultimate rich-man move: spending millions of dollars in lawyers to avoid a $750,000 fine. For the costume, emulate his court steps photograph by putting on your best suit and tie. Then have five friends stand around you and laugh uncontrollably any time you say anything.
It takes a confident man to pull off designer heels and a high-end handbag. Gregg Asher pushes the limits of fashion, which is probably why Lifetime gave him a reality TV show. Grow out some stubble, get a few strategic blond extensions, and rock those heels and a handbag borrowed your most fabulous girlfriend. Own it, guys.