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    Trouble on the Horizon

    Bad girls emerge amid helicopters and Harlequin romance novels on The Bachelor

    Jennifer Chininis
    Jan 14, 2013 | 11:11 pm

    Two hours is a long time to sit through an episode of The Bachelor — even if you can fast forward through the commercials.

    We know we’re supposed to be interested in the one-on-one dates, but the real action is always back at the house, where the frenemies are stewing about what’s happening with the one lucky girl who gets to hang with the hunk.

    Sean chooses one-armed Sarah for his first official date — and he picks her up in a helicopter. Because, you know, that’s how first dates usually start.

    Let’s just cut to the end, when Sarah declares, “I feel like I’m falling in love with Sean. I don’t know how I got so lucky.”

    To which we say, honey, that’s the adrenalin talking. You just jumped off the top of a 35-story building and plummeted 360 feet to a cocktail party pour deux waiting at the bottom.

    Next up, a group date, in which Sean and 13 girls dress up for a photo shoot to compete for a Harlequin romance novel cover shot. Model Kristy knows she’s got this competition locked.

    During hair and makeup, the truth starts to come out. “One girl is driving me bananas: Tierra. I don’t appreciate her personality,” says Robyn from Houston.

    “Tacky hoes are a dime a dozen,” says the makeup artist.

    But Tierra’s like the honey badger. Tierra don’t care. Tierra don’t give a shit. She’s got her eye on the prize. Among our favorite Tierra-isms:

    • “I wouldn’t mind if all the girls go home.”
    • “I’m not going to let any girl stop me from getting a rose.”
    • “I’m not here to meet friends. I’m here to meet Sean.”
    • “No girls are getting in my way.”
    • “I’m not here to play dress up. I’m here for Sean. And I want Sean to see what Tierra really wants.”

    And sweet, trusting Sean falls for Tierra and her mascara. “I want someone who is very sweet, has a good, genuine heart, who is sincere. It just took me five seconds to realize you have that,” he says to her back at the house. Um, what?

    Also back at the house, there’s a bachelorette casualty. Yoga instructor Katie is the first to come to her senses and decides that this is, in fact, a really weird way to meet a guy.

    “I just feel like this is not the right setting for me. I really do. I feel like I need to go home,” she says. And off she goes.

    Fast forward to one-on-one date No. 2, with Desiree. After he plays a practical joke on her at an art show, they take a dip in the obligatory hot tub and banter about how comfortable they are with each other.

    “You want to know a secret?” he says. “You’ve seen every side of me. Like, this is me. You’ve seen 100 percent of me. And no one else has brought that out in me yet.”

    “We’re a pretty good match,” she replies.

    “I know,” he says.

    There must be something in the hot tub water.

    “I can see myself being with Des,” Sean says later. “And I can see myself marrying someone like Des. Right now, I see every quality I would look for in a wife. And a best friend.”

    Show’s over, right? Not yet, friends!

    Cut back to the house, preceding the rose ceremony. Tierra’s not the only one causing trouble. The girls can’t figure out Amanda, who sits on the couch, scowling. She is oddly quiet with them but turns on the charm with Sean.

    These girls know how to work Mr. Nice Guy. He gives Tierra a rose, and the camera cuts to Robyn, who looks away.

    When Amanda gets a rose, Des shakes her head.

    Game on.

    Model Kristy knows how to work the camera at the Harlequin romance novel photo shoot.

    Harlequin romance novel photo shoot on The Bachelor
    Photo courtesy of ABC
    Model Kristy knows how to work the camera at the Harlequin romance novel photo shoot.
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    Movie Review

    Jennifer Lawrence plays overwrought mom in thriller Die My Love

    Alex Bentley
    Nov 7, 2025 | 3:23 pm
    Jennifer Lawrence in Die My Love
    Photo by Kimberley French/courtesy of MUBI
    Jennifer Lawrence in Die My Love.

    Writer/director Lynne Ramsay does not make feel-good movies. Her previous two films —You Were Never Really Here and We Need to Talk About Kevin — were about a traumatized veteran who tracks down missing girls for a living and parents reckoning with a child who might be a sociopath, respectively. Her latest, Die My Love, has a story as dark as its title.

    Grace (Jennifer Lawrence) and Jackson (Robert Pattinson) are a married couple who move into a run-down house that used to belong to Jackson’s uncle, who shot and killed himself on the property. That doesn’t exactly scream “great vibes,” but the somewhat manic duo quickly introduce a child into the equation, an event that forms a schism between two people who previously seemed to be on the same off-kilter wavelength.

    While Jackson works to provide for the family, Grace is left to take care of the baby and herself at the somewhat remote house. She doesn’t appear to be a big fan of the arrangement, engaging in all manner of odd behavior, like crawling around the floor, talking to herself, and taking the baby on miles-long walks to visit her mother-in-law, Pam (Sissy Spacek), who’s not doing well herself after recently losing her husband, Harry (Nick Nolte).

    Ramsay, who co-wrote the film with Enda Walsh and Alice Birch, foregrounds Grace’s experience above all others, but the film is far from straightforward. The idea of post-partum depression is raised as a reason for Grace’s weird behavior, but as both she and Jackson are introduced as two people who skew to the “ab” side of normal, it’s difficult to say that everything she does is due to feelings that arise after giving birth.

    Plus, Grace has plenty to be upset about in general, including living in a death house, being left alone with their child the majority of the time, and Jackson bringing home a yapping dog without even so much as a conversation. But the manifestation of her anger/depression is hard to parse, as Ramsay includes scenes of her carrying around a butcher knife, meeting up with a mysterious figure on a motorcycle, and other strange things that may or may not actually be happening.

    There is clearly a lot of metaphorical work being done by seemingly random things like the reappearance of a black horse on multiple occasions, blaring rock music that accompanies several scenes, and the use of the 1x1 aspect ratio by Ramsay. It’s easy to feel the intensity of the film’s central relationship and their conflicts even if you can’t make heads or tails of the allusions that the filmmaker seems to love.

    Lawrence is put through the wringer almost as much as she was in Darren Aronofsky’s Mother!, and her performance is one that can be felt strongly. Still, because the narrative is unclear, she often appears to be overwrought in certain scenes. Pattinson never fits well with his uncaring and/or oblivious character. Spacek makes a nice impression in a limited amount of screen time, but why Ramsay chose to use the ultra-talented LaKeith Stanfield in the nothing part of the motorcycle rider is baffling.

    Those who love to dig into symbolism and non-linear storytelling will have a field day with the arty Die My Love. But for everyone else, anything Ramsay might have been trying to say about the difficulties of being a mother gets buried under many scenes that don’t make any logical sense and over-the-top acting that’s only fit to match the bizarreness of the film itself.

    ---

    Die My Love is now playing in theaters.

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