Editor's note: There's so much that's beautiful, funny, smart and informative on the Internet. Problem is, there's also a bunch of garbage. Here's the best of the web right now:
1. Harlem Shake, what are you? The latest Internet craze is widely open to interpretation, which is perhaps why everyone likes it so much. Dirk Nowitzki and the Dallas Mavericks got in on the fun, as did Dallas dad Matt McClard, whose "Harlem Shake With My Son" video has 1.5 million views and counting.
2. Ten clues that the zombie outbreak being announced on your television is not a hoax. After folks in Great Falls, Montana, fell victim to a false warning of attacking zombies, NPR put together this handy-dandy check-list of ways to know if the next report is real or fake.
3. Between two ferns: Oscar buzz edition. Zach Galifianakis will make you giggle awkwardly at your desk as he interviews Jessica Chastain, Sally Field and Bradley Cooper. This is part II in a series, so catch up here. It should go without saying that this Funny or Die video is NSFW.
4. Thirty-seven people who are worse at cooking than you. The bar isn't set very high in my case, but even I can successfully cook a frozen pizza and slice-and-bake cookies. These people Buzzfeed found? Not so much.
5. The Lincoln Legacy: Features on America's 16th president by Ralph Waldo Emerson, Christopher Hitchens and Gary Wills. I know you probably think we're just a place for grumpy cat photos and viral YouTube videos. But February 12 is Abe Lincoln's birthday, punks. Respect it.
If you see this scene from your kitchen window, you are either on the set of Walking Dead or the zombie apocalypse is really here.
