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Texas Rangers get a theme song, dogs don pantyhose and God has a gigantic Internet footprint

Editor's note: There's so much that's beautiful, funny, smart and informative on the Internet. Problem is, there's also a bunch of garbage. Here's the best of the web right now:

1. The Texas Rangers now have a theme song set to the tune of "Thrift Shop." American Idol cast-off Tim Halperin is quite the Rangers fan. He recently debuted his rap-parody of the song "Thrift Shop" on 103.7 Lite FM. Falls under the "so bad it's good" category.

2. Dogs wearing pantyhose. This is apparently the latest meme to take off in China. We can clearly see why.

3. God reveals gigantic Internet footprint. You probably thought you had a pretty good online presence, didn't you? Well it's nothing compared to the Almighty, who documents every time someone thanks Him for a sandwich.

4. President of Malawi says Madonna made poor people dance for her. Rule No. 1 of humanitarianism: Do not make poor people dance for you. There is no rule No. 2.

5. Dad documents every time his son cries with bluntly titled Tumblr. Before you feel guilty about reveling in a child's pain, know that reasons for this toddler's tears are as simple as "his brothers boots don't fit," or "his milk is in the wrong cup."

Does this qualify as animal cruelty?

Dogs wearing pantyhose

laughingsquid.com

Does this qualify as animal cruelty?

Gearing up

Party like a champ at CultureMap's big Dallas sports bash The Tailgate

Dallas Cowboys tailgating

Getty Images

Tailgating can be more fun than the actual games.

CultureMap is getting fired up for the exciting return of The Tailgate, our all-out party devoted to everyone’s favorite way to get in the gameday spirit.

For the event’s 2024 edition, we’re partying at The Empire Room in the Design District. Presented by Verizon, The Tailgate takes place from 6-9 pm Monday, December 9, and tickets are already on sale.

Attendees can look forward to sports-inspired bites from some of their favorite Dallas-area restaurants, premium cocktails, memorabilia from Texas legends, and plenty more game-day fun.

Popular Dallas restaurants and chefs will create tailgate-inspired dishes for attendees to sample and vote for their favorite. Participants include:

Anaya's Seafood
Cenzo’s Pizza & Deli
McRae's American Bistro & Cocktails
Le Rêve Gelato & Pâtisserie
JOA GRILL
Chef Will Salisbury
Postino
JW Marriott Dallas Arts District
Snuffers
The Omni Dallas Hotel
Y.O. Ranch Steakhouse

We’ll also soon be asking readers to vote for their favorite wing joint of 2024. Our editors have put together a list of 16 candidates that will go head-to-head in a bracket-style tournament, the Ultimate Wing Showdown. Your winner will be revealed at the party.

The Tailgate Dallas 2022 CultureMap last held The Tailgate in Dallas in 2022.Photo by Ashley Gongora

The event will also shine a spotlight on local sports organizations, including the Dallas Stars. The Frisco Roughriders' mascot, Bull Moose, will be on hand for fun giveaways. And Former FC Dallas soccer star Kenny Cooper will kick it with fans in a meet-and-greet.

Attendees can expect more revelry, games, and prizes courtesy of our event sponsors and local vendors, including Verizon, HOWDY, and more.

We'll keep you up to date on all things Tailgate-related in a special editorial series of stories leading up to the event.

A limited number of Early Bird tickets are on sale now at discounted rates of $35 for general admission (regularly $50) and $60 for VIP (regularly $75).

All tickets include bites by participating restaurants, complimentary premium beverages, and access to fun activities throughout the event. VIP tickets come with one-hour early entry, access to a dedicated VIP bar, a meet-and-greet with a top Dallas athlete, and more perks for an elevated experience.

Head here to buy your tickets now.

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The Tailgate is sponsored by Verizon, HOWDY, and more to be announced.

chefs culturemap culturemap-events dallas stars parties sports tailgate the tailgate

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