St. Croix Shocker

Claws come out when The Bachelor and his sex kittens sun bathe in St. Croix

St. Croix Shocker

Claws come out when The Bachelor and his sex kittens sun bathe in St. Croix

The first — and last — date for Tierra and Sean.Photo courtesy of ABC
Well, at least they had fun.Photo courtesy of ABC
At this moment, Tierra has no idea that she's going home.Photo courtesy of ABC

This week, Sean plus six head to St. Croix, also known as the Island Where the Bachelor Comes to His Senses.

Perhaps we should have had more sympathy for Tierra. No girl can possibly predict how she will behave when forced to live with a dozen or so other women vying for the attention of the same man, right?

However, if a girl can’t get along with even one of those dozen, shouldn’t that shed some light on her ability to play nice with others?

AshLee tells Sean that Tierra is two-faced. And his sister, who flies all the way to St. Croix for a quick cameo, puts more doubts in his head.

“My sister told me if a girl cannot get along with other girls, then that’s trouble,” he says. “That’s weighing heavily on me.”

And so, after an epic smackdown with AshLee — whom Tierra accuses of sabotage— tear-streaked Tierra is finally sent packing.

We are torn by this development. On the one hand, her antics are tiring, and it doesn’t matter who the guy is: You don’t want him to end up with a nut bag. On the other hand, Tierra single-handedly created some of the most entertaining moments of the season.

Good news, though. She doesn’t leave without a few parting shots:

“I’m not friends with girls who like my boyfriends.”
“The cougar’s back in town.”
“Girls are jealous. Men love me.”
“I don’t need to sabotage other people’s relationship to get to the top.”
“I can’t control my eyebrow. I can’t control what’s on my face 24/7. If I could walk around with a smile on 24/7, I would. But my face would get freaking tired.”
“Nobody will take my sparkle away.”

In other news, AshLee tells Sean she loves him, Desiree hogs all the attention on the group date, and Sean can’t believe how crazy he is about the girl who showed up the first night in a wedding gown. Go figure.

Lesley gets another one-on-one date, but only because Sean wants to be sure he’s really not feeling it before he sends her home. On their date, Lesley wants to tell him she’s falling for him.

Be glad you didn’t, girlfriend. That would have been so much worse.

In a weird turn of events, Catherine bursts into tears when Sean rejects Lesley, because Catherine thinks Lesley and Sean have a lot more in common.

“If he doesn’t want Lesley, I don’t know why I’m here,” she says. “This is extremely tough for me. My beliefs are shattered about what he wants.”

Meanwhile, AshLee can’t stop throwing around the L word — even though, for a split second, she thinks her spat with Tierra might have cost her a rose.

“I can’t describe the overwhelming feeling I have for him,” AshLee says. “This is my husband. And love does conquer all.”

And we thought Tierra was the crazy one.

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Movie Review

Stephen King film adaptation The Life of Chuck aims for the heart

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Just like actors, once a filmmaker becomes known for a certain genre, it can be difficult to escape that pigeonholing. Writer/director Mike Flanagan has worked for 20 years in both film and television, and literally every project he’s done has been related to horror. He’s finally breaking out with The Life of Chuck, which is ironically based on a short story of the same name by Stephen King.

Told in three chapters in reverse order, the film is almost impossible to describe without giving away its magic. The first section centers on Marty (Chiwetel Ejiofor), a teacher grappling, like everyone around him, with what seems to be the world falling apart. He’s comforted to a degree by reuniting with his ex-wife, Felicia (Karen Gillan), but is also baffled by multiple ads touting the retirement of Charles “Chuck” Krantz (Tom Hiddleston) after “39 great years.”

The second section consists of little more than a slightly younger Chuck happening upon Taylor (The Pocket Queen), a drummer busking on a street corner, giving Chuck and a younger woman, Janice (Annalise Basso), the inspiration to start dancing. The final section goes back to the childhood of Chuck (Benjamin Pajak), where he’s raised by his grandparents (Mark Hamill and Mia Sara), discovers dance as an outlet, and wonders about various small mysteries.

Flanagan finds a way to deliver a lot of story with relatively little effort. Using a wry narrator (Nick Offerman), a limited number of locations, and a series of great small performances, he creates an intriguing premise with few straightforward answers. The structure of the film is designed to confuse the viewer until just the right moment, and the revelation forces you to reexamine everything that came before.

The biggest accomplishment by Flanagan is making what are essentially three short films and having each of them resonate equally. The film contains elements of science fiction, although the first section may hit a bit too close to home for some of those watching. All three sections, though, have a heartwarming bent to them that sells their central idea without becoming overly saccharine.

To do so, each of the characters have to connect in a short amount of time. The casting of the film is crucial, and not only does that department succeed with the main roles, but a series of small roles are filled expertly as well. Carl Lumbly as a funeral home owner, David Dastmalchian and Harvey Guillen as parents of students, Matthew Lillard as Marty’s neighbor, Q’orianka Kilcher as Chuck’s wife, and Jacob Tremblay as a teenage Chuck are just a few of the recognizable actors that do yeoman’s work in their brief time on screen.

Hiddleston is only prominently featured in the second chapter, but his performance there and in small glimpses throughout makes a big impression. Ejiofor is given the star turn in the first chapter and he absolutely kills, both in moments by himself and in scenes with Gillan, with whom he has great chemistry. Hamill, making a rare non-voiceover appearance outside of the Star Wars universe, and Sara, in her first notable role in 11 years, are also very memorable in the final chapter.

The Life of Chuck is a film that’s filled with emotion, but the full impact of the story is not felt until the final moments. It has a mysterious journey that is initially frustrating, but the performances keep the film going until it gets to its satisfying payoff.

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The Life of Chuck is now playing in theaters.

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