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    Let Me Sum Up

    Why J.C. Penney's CEO should start treating us like the idiots we are. Plus: Turning blue!

    Eric Celeste
    Jan 24, 2013 | 11:31 am

    I’m going to tell you why I’m an idiot and why J.C. Penney CEO Ron Johnson needs to realize that he needs idiots like me to succeed.

    Johnson, CEO for the past year, has had a rocky start, primarily because his idea of doing away with silly mark-up and discount games treated consumers like they were idiots. His “honest pricing” plans resulted in big declines in sales for the Dallas-based retail giant.

    Why is that? Let me ’splain. No, there is no time. Let me sum up.

    The fact is, we’d like to believe we make rational decisions when we buy things, but we don’t. People who understand this, who don’t try to outsmart the game, succeed.

    I don’t shop at J.C. Penney, but I do shop at Banana Republic, which is like the JCP of my generation, only with the husky-men lines that men like me usually need. (I make it work.) Just about every day, I get an email from someone at Banana Republic, the subject line of which begins “40% off …”

    Now, I don’t have to tell you what a math genius I am. Let me just say that I realize that if I get 300 e-mails a year telling me just about everything in the store is 40 percent off, then the original pricing is bulsh. The price for that sweater or pair of slacks is inflated, and they keep marking the price down to what I’ll actually pay for it, and we all pretend I’m getting a deal.

    It’s a stupid dance, but I play along because, holy crap, did you see what I got today for 40 percent off! And it’s all so slimming!

    The fact is, we’d like to believe we make rational decisions when we buy things, but we don’t. We buy Apple products that may not be as fast or as cheap as competitors, but they look kick ass and they’re simple to use, and those are pretty important qualities when it comes to electronics. We buy clothes that are too expensive but tell ourselves we got a great deal so long as it comes with a sales tag.

    We are, quite simply, not as smart as we think we are. We are retail dullards.

    People who understand this, who don’t try to outsmart the game, succeed. I heard a great story this week from a former insider at a huge national company that sells its wares on the Internet. He said the company hired a VP of marketing with a stellar reputation. My friend — super smart, creative, the whole magilla — was appalled at said marketing genius’ process.

    “She has a team of kids out of trade school who can barely Photoshop. She has them crank out hundreds of ads per day,” he explained. “No rhyme or reason to them. Then they load everything up into the ad channels and see what performs. They take what is stat significant, then iterate on those hundreds of times (again, no thought process). They were crazy excited when the addition of a 1-by-1 pixel pink square resulted in massive gains.

    “This process directly resulted in huge profits. I'm talking $50 million-plus in revenue. Because [people are] batshit.”

    And this is the problem with Ron Johnson, who has tried to outsmart the market. I am dumb. I will continue to buy overpriced crap that is marked down 40 percent simply so I can say I got a deal. People will click on boxes with pink squares on them.

    Another buddy, who has covered the company, says he needs to let JCP have its sales, and somehow brand the new stores as a totally different concept. Try your honesty crap there, because it won’t work on me, or others like me, because we like to be lied to when we’re browsing through your store. Because you may be smart, but people are batshit.

    Elsewhere

    Mark Davis is an idiot. No news there.

    The City Council is full of idiots. No news there.

    So, Dems are gonna turn Texas blue? I’ve heard this before. I’ll have much to say about this next week.

    Retweets

    No, YOU compare state/federal forms filed by Perry, Dewhurst. I’m going to lunch.

    Compare state/federal forms filed by Perry, Dewhurst RT @texastribune: Weak disclosure laws keep public in dark trib.it/XylrmF

    — Emily Ramshaw (@eramshaw) January 24, 2013

    The "honest pricing" strategy at JCP doesn't work.

      
    JCPenney Facebook
    The "honest pricing" strategy at JCP doesn't work.
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    Heat Wave News

    Dallas pet owners should take these steps with oncoming heat wave

    Teresa Gubbins
    May 13, 2025 | 10:31 am
    Dog drinking water
    SPCA
    Keep your pets hydrated. Consider putting out a kiddie pool.

    Dallas weather is about to take a serious turn, and the SPCA has valuable advice on what steps pet owners should take. It's easy to forget that animals get hit hard by the heat, and especially in Texas: A report by Veterinarians.org found that Texas was No. 1 on the list of states with heat-related pet deaths. Based on data they compiled from 2018-2022, Texa had 40 reported heat-related pet deaths — more than six times the national five-year average.

    In a statement, SPCA of Texas Interim Chief Veterinarian Valarie Tynes, DVM, DACVB, DACAW reminds pet owners that their pets have very few ways to cool themselves down.

    “As a veterinarian, I’ve seen far too many cases of dogs and cats suffering from heatstroke, often brought into the emergency room when it’s already too late," Tynes says. "Our pets have very limited ways to cool themselves down. They can sweat a small amount through their paw pads, but their main way to release excess heat is by panting. Panting helps pets cool off through the evaporation of moisture, but it only provides limited relief, especially during extreme temperatures."

    Tynes says that, when the body can’t shed heat fast enough, serious internal damage begins to occur.

    "The proteins and chemicals that keep the body functioning start to break down," she says. "I’ve seen heat affect the kidneys and brain—organs and processes that are incredibly sensitive to high temperatures."

    Breed, overall health and environment all can influence how at-risk a pet is, but one thing is always true: prevention is critical. Please don’t underestimate how dangerous heat can be.

    Tynes advises pet owners to keep pets in cool, shaded areas, provide plenty of fresh water, and avoid walks or outdoor activity during the hottest parts of the day.

    Here are some proactive measures to keep pets safe and comfortable during these sweltering days:

    Keep your pets hydrated
    Make sure your furry friends have access to fresh, cool water at all times. Consider placing multiple water bowls around your home and refill them regularly. If your pets must be outside during the day, make sure there are plenty of shady spaces throughout the day and several shaded, nontippable water bowls filled with ice water. Do not use metal bowls outside.

    If possible, a small wading pool filled with cold ice water and placed in a shaded area outside is preferred. This not only allows pets to drink but also to cool off in the water when overheating.

    Schedule exercise with your pets wisely on warm days
    Give your pet plenty of water before and after walks or playtime. Be sure to avoid strenuous activities during the hottest parts of the day. Early mornings (before 10 a.m.) or late evenings (after 5 p.m.)—when temperatures are lower—are ideal for walks or playtime.

    Hot pavement can burn paw pads, so opt for walking on grassy areas. Consider using paw wax or booties to shield sensitive paws from hot pavement, rocks or sand that can cause burns and blisters. If you cannot hold the back of your hand on the pavement for five to 10 seconds, the pavement is too hot for your pet.

    Make sure your pets have plenty of shade
    If your pet spends any time outside, be sure it has plenty of shade so he or she can get out of the sun. This is where the ground or grass will be coolest—under a tree, an umbrella, or a simple, open structure. Do not tie or restrain the pet so that it cannot move between shady spots as needed.

    If it is really hot and humid, bring your pet indoors and into air-conditioned areas.

    Never leave your pet in a locked car
    No matter what, even if you think you will be away from the car for just a few minutes, do not leave your pet unattended in a parked car. The car can absorb enough energy within minutes to become a death mobile. A cracked window or two is not enough to prevent heatstroke when it’s hot, or even warm. It is also not enough to park in the shade on a hot day and leave all the windows and even sunroof open.

    While weather in the 70s may seem harmless, a Stanford study showed that in just an hour, a car’s temperature rose to 116 degrees internally when left out in 72-degree heat. It is not recommended to leave the air conditioner running in a car for your pet. Oftentimes the air conditioner malfunctions, leading to overheating inside the vehicle.

    Heatstroke is a serious and potentially life-threatening condition that can affect pets when they are exposed to high temperatures and excessive heat. Dogs and cats cannot regulate their body temperature as efficiently as humans, making them more susceptible to heatstroke. It can occur in as little as 10-15 minutes, especially in hot and humid environments or when an animal is left in a parked car.

    Symptoms of heatstroke in pets include excessive panting, drooling, rapid breathing, lethargy, vomiting, diarrhea and collapse. It is crucial to act quickly if you suspect your pet is suffering from heatstroke. Move them to a cool and shaded area, offer fresh water, and use cool (not cold) water or damp towels to gradually lower their body temperature.

    Then take the pet directly to an emergency veterinary clinic. Heat stroke can be fatal and can come on very quickly, so it’s best not to take any chances.

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