Reality Recaps

Baptisms, boogers and family business take center stage on this week's Big RichTexas

Because Leslie Birkland is now convinced that Kalyn Braun’s recent illness was due to promiscuity, she decides to step it up as a godmother.

Of course it can be difficult to find the right words to encourage a wayward 18-year-old, but Leslie fails epically with this blunt delivery.

I just wonder about your moral compass. You’ve just developed a little bit of a reputation. A reputation as being a slut. If you can just dedicate yourself to actually be moral and all of your actions, base it on morality.

She tells Kalyn that she is arranging to have her baptized. Because baptism makes one less slutty?

I’ve just been your godmother. I was just appointed that but there was no official ceremony.

Kalyn (and Leslie, if we’re being honest) seems confused about the process of, and the meaning behind, baptism, “Is Leslie crazy? This is my punishment — being drowned in a pool?”

She doesn’t get fully into the baptism scene until she realizes there’s a new dress involved. She tries on several, but it’s the short, strapless one that screams purity. And things are looking up until Les announces that Kalyn’s bio mom will be at the ceremony.

This week, Bonnie and Jason meet Booger’s strikingly normal parents. But because their son wore a fedora and airbrushed faux tuxedo tee to the dinner, there must be something unusual below the surface. However, it’s actually Bon who turns out to be the weird one: “I teach biochemistry. I love parasites.” She wraps up the night with a compliment.

You have a wonderful son. And he, like, pet-u-ates don’t judge a book by its cover.

Bon, it’s “perpetuates.”

On the day of Kalyn’s outdoor baptism, a storm sweeps through Dallas. With thunder booming in all directions, the pastor and Kalyn, wearing her new dress, get in the pool while the wet guests look on.

The preacher explains that when she puts Kalyn under water and brings her back up, it’s a new start. But she only half-dipped Kalyn, leaving her face above water. Do over? Guess not. The preacher lady released the doves, and no one called a technical foul.

During the baptism party, Kalyn’s estranged mother approaches her with a less-than-eloquent, but nonetheless valid point.

With you getting baptized today and putting the past behind you, I thought we could try to start a fresh start.

Told you so. The half-dunk left Kalyn the same little brat she was 10 minutes ago.

Today is my day. You come in when it’s my day to shine.

One thing leads to another, and Kalyn begins to shout at Terry with all guests looking on. Kalyn darts into the street; Leslie and Terry follow. In a dramatic ending, Terry begs for a second chance. But we’ll have to wait until next week to find out if Kalyn is willing.

Hungry for more? Read the full recap on Reality Nation.

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Movie Review

Cillian Murphy takes on church in Irish film Small Things Like These

Photo by Enda Bowe/Lionsgate

Cillian Murphy in Small Things Like These.

Last we saw actor Cillian Murphy, he was starring in the titular role of Oppenheimer, a role that would go on to earn him a Best Actor Oscar, not to mention many awards for the film itself. Instead of a big, flashy follow-up to build on that momentum, Murphy has gone in the opposite direction with the small and personal Small Things Like These.

Set in the 1980s in Murphy’s native Ireland, the film centers on Bill (Murphy), who owns a coal delivery company. One of his clients is the local convent, and during a delivery he witnesses a young pregnant woman being forced into the convent against her will by her mother. The scene triggers memories from his own childhood when he was raised by a single mother.

Every subsequent delivery to the convent has him questioning his own morality, although his taciturn nature doesn’t allow him to share his misgivings with his wife, Eileen (Eileen Walsh). With the Catholic Church an all-encompassing entity in Ireland, even if Bill wanted to help the girls who are trapped and mistreated at the convent, he’s not sure of any way to go about it.

Directed by Tim Mielants and written by Enda Walsh, the film has a slow build to it, so slow that it is a little difficult to ascertain the point of the story. The filmmakers go back and forth between scenes showing Bill as an adult and Bill as a child, and even though they each contain elements of trauma for the characters, the connection between the two timelines is not as strong as they might want it to be.

Even when it’s not part of a scene, the power of the church is the driving force of the film. Bill is clearly having a crisis of faith given his history and what he sees, but his wife seems to be willfully ignorant of any faults of the church and remains a true believer. The few segments that take the audience inside the convent are full of unforgiving nuns, with Sister Mary (Emily Watson) as their ultra-stern leader.

Given that this is an Irish film featuring all Irish actors, heavy accents accompany the majority of the dialogue, making it difficult to understand at times. This is clearly not an issue with the filmmaking and it helps with the verisimilitude of the story, but anyone who doesn’t have a lot of experience with the Irish accent may find themselves a little lost and/or disengaged with the emotions of the story.

Murphy’s role in Oppenheimer and this one don’t share much in common save for the fact that he clearly put his whole self into each of them. This is a testament to Murphy’s skills and dedication that he cares as much about an inherently local story as he did about a world-changing one. Walsh and Watson are also great as two women who have a huge influence on Bill’s outlook on life.

Small Things Like These, based on the book by Claire Keegan, is not as huge a takedown of the Catholic Church as some other films, but it’s still a searing indictment of its arcane practices. It’s one made even more effective by using a smaller story of one man’s lonely fight against injustice.

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Small Things Like These opens in theaters on November 8.

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