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    Movie Review

    Rose Byrne plays one stressed-out mom in If I Had Legs I'd Kick You

    Alex Bentley
    Oct 24, 2025 | 4:24 pm
    Conan O'Brien and Rose Byrne in If I Had Legs I'd Kick You

    Conan O'Brien and Rose Byrne in If I Had Legs I'd Kick You

    Photo courtesy of A24

    Movie history is littered with depictions of stressed-out mothers who have breakdowns due to the pressure put on them by their children, spouses, or society in general. Recent examples include Hereditary, Tully, and Nightbitch, with each of them finding different ways to depict their main character’s struggles. Yet another put-upon mother goes through the wringer in the oddly-named If I Had Legs I’d Kick You.

    When we meet Linda (Rose Byrne), she’s already in the middle of a huge ball of stress. Her daughter (Delaney Quinn) suffers from an unnamed illness that requires around-the-clock care and frequent doctor visitors. Her husband, Charles (Christian Slater), is a boat captain whose job keeps him away from home for long periods of time. And her job as a therapist requires her to hear other people’s problems, necessitating her seeing a fellow therapist (Conan O’Brien) on a daily basis.

    Nearly everyone else she encounters in the movie adds to her anxiety, including Caroline (Danielle Macdonald), a new mother who’s constantly worried about her baby; Dr. Spring (Mary Bronstein), who constantly harps on Linda to get her daughter to eat; an officious parking attendant at the hospital; and a sneering desk clerk at the motel she and her daughter are forced to stay at after a plumbing disaster at home. Consequently, she dismisses James (A$AP Rocky), another motel worker, the one person who treats her with a modicum of kindness.

    Written and directed by Bronstein, the film is a harrowing experience that somehow also manages to be darkly funny at times. Linda is dealing with way too much for one person to adequately handle, something that is compounded by the fact that nobody really listens to her, not even the therapist she’s paying to do so. Scenes bounce back and forth between Linda demonstrating righteous anger at what the world is throwing at her and crushing guilt over supposedly not doing enough for her child.

    Bronstein depicts Linda’s journey in a number of interesting ways, some straightforward and others not so much. Bronstein makes liberal use of close-ups on Linda’s face, heightening the feeling that the world is closing in on her. The plumbing problem at her home results in a huge hole in the ceiling, which becomes the source of some unexplained phenomena, a choice that might have been unnecessary.

    What’s most striking about the film is how hardly anyone is on Linda’s side. Since the film joins the story as it’s already in progress, the audience is left to guess as to how Linda has behaved in the past to garner such negative interactions from people who should be helping her. While she’s not a perfect person, she also doesn’t appear to be such a jerk that she should be treated with disdain everywhere she goes.

    Byrne, who’s gravitated toward lighter roles in recent years, is an absolute marvel in this part. The more stress Linda feels, the more she becomes disheveled, and Byrne makes you feel every ounce of the character’s pain. O’Brien, who’s rarely had to play anyone but “Conan O’Brien” before, is surprisingly good, tamping down his comic sensibility to complement Byrne well. A$AP Rocky also makes a nice impression, elevating a character that’s a little underwritten.

    The role of a mom is never an easy one, and that’s in the best of circumstances. If I Had Legs I’d Kick You - a title that is never explained yet still somehow fits - earns its stripes by demonstrating how the often thankless job of motherhood can become even more distressing when the mom in question is given little to no support.

    ---

    If I Had Legs I'd Kick You is now playing in select theaters.

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    news/entertainment

    Listen up

    Underground hi-fi 'listening bar' Shyboy opens in downtown Dallas

    Stephanie Allmon Merry
    Mar 2, 2026 | 3:10 pm
    Shyboy
    Photo courtesy of Shyboy
    Shyboy lounge is new on Main Street in downtown Dallas.

    A new lounge is turning up the volume beneath the streets of downtown Dallas: Shyboy, billed as Dallas' first "hi fi bar," will debut at 1313 Main St., in the subterranean level of The Drakestone building.

    According to a release, opening weekend events will take place March 4-7.

    The new nightlife concept comes from The Headington Companies, the folks behind the Joule hotel and other Main Street developments.

    "Inspired by hi-fi listening bars around the world, with roots in Tokyo’s post-WWII 'jazz kissas,' Shyboy offers a social and listening experience unlike any other nightlife space, with progressive, genre-bending programming, signature hi-balls and cocktails, and two state-of-the-art OJAS sound systems, designed by Devon Turnbull," says the release. (Turnbull's speakers have been used in projects with Mark Ronson, Public Records in Brooklyn, and more.)

    Jazz kissas are cafes that specialize in the playing of and listening to recorded jazz music; here, jazz is played for active listening rather than as background serenade.

    Piggybacking on that idea, Shyboy will offer "an immersive environment where design, lighting, and atmosphere are treated as essential elements of the performance, inviting guests into a unique experience that blurs the line between listener and participant," they say.

    The 3,000-square-foot underground space, once a bank vault in the historic Davis Building (renovated and rebranded as The Drakestone residential building in 2017), will house one of the most advanced sound systems in the city within its historic concrete "bones." Interiors were designed by acclaimed Dallas-based 5G Studio Collaborative.

    The venue includes two distinct spaces. The main room functions as a social listening environment, where towering speakers double as sculptural focal points beneath curved underground ceilings.

    A second chamber, called The Vault, is designed as a more intimate lounge for private events, sound classes, performances, and art exhibitions. The Vault’s entrance features an installation from artist Lachlan Turczan’s Optical Resonance series, which uses water and light to visibly respond to sound waves, the release says. The room also includes a newly commissioned reflective sculpture by Florentine artist Duccio Maria Gambi.

    Shyboy’s inaugural month will include a lineup spanning house, deep grooves, soul, and global dance sounds. Opening weekend, March 4-7, will welcome talent like JT Donaldson (Shyboy music director), Dallas legend Red Eye, Sound Advice Vol. 1, Skeme Richards, Patrice Scott + Brandon Epocha, and Wamono Nights.

    The calendar later in the year will feature appearances by celebrated DJs and producers such as Theo Parrish, Derrick Carter, Eli Escobar, Kai Alcé, and the Los Angeles-based listening collective In Sheep’s Clothing.

    Shyboy’s cocktail menu starts at $13, and the bar will serve soft-serve ice cream.

    Throughout March, there will be no cover charge for entry; for more information, visit the venue's website.


    downtown dallasheadingtonmusicbars
    news/entertainment

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