This morning, we’re scattershooting while wondering whatever happened to Dick Armey?

Oh! There he is. Yesterday evening, Mother Jones broke the story that the former U.S. House majority leader from North Texas resigned from his position as chairman and trustee of FreedomWorks, the Tea Party-friendly political organization.

The story is a fun read, if you like to imagine old men writing angry "I quit!" emails. (I picture seven similar emails still in his "Drafts" folder, each with more cuss words.) It quotes from Armey’s email to the FreedomWorks president, which suggests this was not an entirely amicable parting. For example, see the edited excerpt below:

Was this because the Tea Partiers/GOP contingent got its ass handed to itself in the national elections? Armey told the magazine that he was unhappy with the way things went down a month ago, but that’s not the reason he’s leaving in a huff. (He wasn’t really specific as to why he was exiting the group he co-founded, in fact.)

What can we do then? What the media do best: wildly speculate!

Now, I’ve quit a job or two in my day, so lemme look for clues. At the end of his resignation letter, we see Armey also asked that FreedomWorks (which really needs an exclamation point at the end, don’t you think?) send him via email “all user names, passwords, security questions and security answers for all accounts, web sites and social media, including but not limited to Facebook and Twitter, created in my name.”

Ignoring the urge to speculate what those names (“Sweet Tea”), passwords (“rightasrain”), security questions (“What’s better, puppies or America?”) and security answers (“Won’t choose”) might be, why would he want these? Sex tape hidden online somewhere? Is he running the Obama parody account @ThePresObama?

Probably not. The key to figuring out Armey’s resignation is not his pissy little letter but his age: 72. You get past 70, your give-a-damn bursts. You are no longer able to give one. Like Bruce Bartlett and other smart, longtime conservatives — say what you want about Armey, the guy is incredibly intelligent — he has probably just had it with placating the nut job wing of the party.

This is a guy, remember, who toward the end of his reign in Congress (1985-2003) rightly was worried about voting for the war in Iraq until Vice President Dick Cheney lied to him, to his face, like a rug. (Cheney claimed, according to Texas journalist Robert Draper and others, that Iran was developing tiny nukes, was tied to Al-Qaeda and that Iranians would joyously welcome the U.S. forces.) As he was headed out the door in D.C., Armey said he “deserved better than to be bullshitted by the vice president.”

I suspect he just substituted “my own party” for “vice president” this time.

Elsewhere

Some more southern Dallas golf club discussion, from the DBJ and Unfair Park. I was skeptical that this Byron Nelson move was a done deal, but last night I talked to a person who knows a thing or two about a thing or two, who said, yeah, after 2018, it’s a done deal. So I was wrong.

D Magazine is going to have itself a TV show? Or several TV shows? A whole network? So confused. The only thing I'm sure of is that its 10 Most Beautiful contest will be a part of it. Also: I wrote a whole bunch about this and just now deleted it. Decided I’ll watch first.

This story, on how black male students in DISD think their race and gender affects how they’re treated, was posted late last night, but already a racist has hijacked the comments. They’re getting faster!

Retweets

Cake doll not proportioned correctly. Noggin should be way bigger.

Not local. I just think it’s amazing.