I really want to stop writing about Mike Miles for a while. I support a lot of the changes he’s trying to implement in DISD, at least in theory.

I think it’s fine that he hired high-priced top talent in leadership positions, and I want that precedent set so the district can continue competing with the private sector for the best people. And I think he’s weirdly handsome, if older bald men in suits is your thing. (And it should be.)

I’d really rather write about how crazy Avi Adelman is. But I’ll stick him in “Elsewhere,” because Miles continues to require comment, if only so we can all be on record when we have to say, “I told you so.” As everyone from Jim Schutze to Tod Robberson to li’l ol’ me has said, he’s got to change the narrative.

No one will evaluate the merits of his proposals if he’s spending his time waving his junk at his detractors. “I’m in charge and you can chomp on this!” is a fascinating spectacle, and we will watch and eat our popcorn and forget about children and teachers and learning, because we are the idiocracy.

And this stance is exactly the one Miles has taken. His response to the internal audit, the one that found he violated rules when hiring and his top deputies, is to call it a witch hunt. According to the Dallas Morning News, Miles is completely dismissive of the reports findings, going so far as to criticize the point size of his responses found therein.

There’s petty, there’s ridiculous and then there’s the point-size defense.

Here’s my favorite part of the story:

If you have children, you know how such meetings go. “Did you pee in the sink?” [Child looks away.] “The sink smells like urine. I didn’t pee in the sink. Your father hasn’t peed in the sink since his birthday party. Did you pee in the sink?” [Child flagellates, pulls at underwear.]

This is your narrative, Mike Miles. You are a petulant child, you want your way, everybody leave me alone.

Here’s what you could have done: Thrown yourself on your sword, say you were excited to get started, in a rush to change this district for the better. So you inadvertently steam-rolled some rules that make it hard to get the best people in here. Say I’m sorry, throw the word “proactive” in there, get back to remaking the district.

It’s clear now you won’t do that. Maybe you’re just too stubborn. If only you had someone you could trust, who could give you good PR advice — maybe then you could change the story. Because right now we are bored with it. Everyone hates stories that telegraph the ending.

Elsewhere

So, yeah, Avi Adelman. If you don’t know him, just understand that, even though I know zero details about this case, I’ve got a hundred bucks says he’s completely to blame for everything.

I have a question about Trader Joe’s: Why does anyone care that the company is opening more stores here? That’s where I was often forced to shop in Atlanta. Spoiler alert: they’re awesome if you like crap wine and poor grocery selection.

Steve Blow suggests that, no matter your stance on guns, we can all at least agree that some level of gun control is necessary. Um, has he seen the Internet? Has he talked to a gun nut? I’m sure the commenters will let him know he’s mistaken.

Wind gusts actually reached 66 mph this morning. How do I know? Inside information. Can’t reveal my sources.

Retweets

You know when Captain Kirk screams “Khaaaaan!”? Imagine Hash doing the same thing but yelling, “Benghaaaaazi!”

And here’s a series of tweets that made Frontburner. Enjoy.