Baker's Woes

Reporter's rant: Let them eat cake — as long as it's not a cupcake

When I saw this video, “How to Eat a Cupcake, Like a Gentleman,” I couldn’t contain my laughter. Vivaldi’s “Four Seasons” is the perfect (satirical) background music as a guy continuously fails at eating a cupcake.

No matter how he approaches it — from the side, bottom or top — it looks as if he’s simply stuffing his face. The only method that works is removing the bottom and putting it on top of the frosted muffin top and eating it like a sandwich. Um, that’s a lot of work.

My angst about the cupcake trend is only exacerbated when I go to elegant parties with incredible food, and, sadly, cupcakes are served for dessert. It’s so anticlimactic, an utter disappointment.

When I hear things like “and there was no wedding cake at the wedding, just cupcakes,” I’m nauseated. What would wedding cake master Sylvia Weinstock say? Why are bakers no longer making whole cakes, adorned with chocolate shavings around the side or just simple and cleanly frosted?

I didn't learn to bake cupcakes in culinary school; the real pastry chefs focus on flat-topped cakes, even layers, poured fondant and piping — an art form that is spoiled by cupcake pans. Even my favorite bakery, Society Bakery, sells cupcakes — something I try not to reprimand them for, because their cakes are incredibly delicious.

Why is there even a demand for these paper-wrapped cakes? I really don't care to know. I'm just waiting for the craze that Sprinkles Cupcakes started to end.

Here’s how I see it:

Cupcakes are hard to eat. Half the frosting gets lost on your face.
You’re limited to the size of the pan with cupcakes. But with a cake, you can cut a piece as big or as small as you wish.
The moistness of the cupcake is so unpredictable. You can order red velvet every time you go to your favorite bakery, and it will always be different — and almost always a bit too dry.
If you're gifting with cupcakes, you never know how many to buy. Will three suffice? Or is a baker's dozen necessary?

Why risk getting frosting all over your face or being dissatisfied with a sub-par treat? Ugh. If you’re going to eat dessert, do it properly. Bake or buy a whole cake with two layers — or seven, for that matter. Cut it however you like, grab an actual fork and indulge.

You can (and should) have your cake and eat it too — just as long as it’s not a cupcake.

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Restaurant News Roundup Time

Exclusive Prime rib and fancy lunches lead this Dallas restaurant news

Mirador

Mirador

Mirador

Time for another roundup of restaurant news around Dallas, and there's plenty to chew on: From new lunch and dinner menus to holiday-flavored beers. Even bigger news— the McRib is back, for those who have been anxiously awaiting its return.

Here's what's happening in Dallas restaurant news:

Insomnia Cookies, known for serving warm cookies all day and night, has opened its first store in Grand Prairie, at 2810 S. SH-161, with in-store, pickup, and delivery. From the Classic Chocolate Chunk cookie to favorites like Snickerdoodle and Confetti Deluxe, Cookies & Ice Cream flavors, brookies, brownies, and blondies, a full slate of vegan options, and a rotating limited-edition menu, the brand’s offerings satisfy every sweet tooth. This is their 26th store in Texas and 308th location nationwide.

HoneyBaked Ham has a new Prime Rib item exclusive to Dallas. The Prime Rib averages $26 per pound, with sizes ranging from 3-8 pounds. It serves 6-16 people, depending on the size. There are limited quantities available at each store. It's available at all 10 Dallas locations.

Greenville Avenue Pizza Company is introducing the zesty chicken bacon ranch pizza, the latest from their seasonal pizza lineup. The pizza features a creamy ranch base, grilled chicken, bacon, tender artichokes, fresh spinach, garlic, mozzarella, Parmesan cheese, and topped with a sprinkle of lemon pepper seasoning. The pizza is available for $8.50 a slice, $21-$23 for a 12-inch pizza, and $26 for a 16-inch pizza. It’s available through February 2 at both Greenville Avenue and Peavy Road locations.

Mirador has launched a weekday three-course prix-fixe lunch menu for $30. It starts with a choice of two deviled eggs with caviar and chives, whipped ricotta toast, cup of tomato soup, or salad; second course includes choice of dishes like chicken paillard with Swiss chard, preserved orange sofrito, and aged parmesan; and a farro bowl with cauliflower green goddess, cherries, Marcona almonds. For the third course, there’s a to-go cookie. Available Tuesday through Friday from 11 am - 3 pm.

Broken Yolk Cafe in McKinney has two limited-time items: carrot cake waffle, a cinnamon spice cake batter waffle with shredded carrots and raisins, finished with candied pecans, powdered sugar and cream cheese icing starting at $9; and snickerdoodle latte, combining espresso, cinnamon bun and cookie butter syrup, vanilla cream, milk, and cinnamon sugar, available hot or iced for $6. Available through January 6.

Truluck’s has three new holiday items featuring cake and cocktails. For dessert, there’s chocolate peppermint cake made with layers of chocolate cake, frosted with peppermint cream cheese icing, topped with crushed candy and Godiva chocolate sauce; $14 per slice, $10 per petite slice, and $70 whole cake. Cocktails are $17.50 and feature Holiday Nog, a spiced cocktail with Bourbon and Bourbon cream; and Nutcracker Rum Punch, a rum ball balanced with honey and fruit. Available at Dallas, Plano, and Southlake locations until the end of December.

Fleming’s Prime Steakhouse & Wine Bar in Plano has launched new holiday items, including a Japanese A5 Wagyu experience served rare with a sizzling hot stone tableside accompanied by miso glaze, grated horseradish and black lava salt. There’s a new $140 Season of Opulence filet and lobster four-course menu; and holiday weekend lunch starting at $28, featuring choice of steak frites, cabernet filet, or barbecue salmon fillet. Also, there's a new $94 caviar service featuring Hackleback caviar served with blinis, capers, chives, sour cream, egg, and shallots. Available through January 6.

Jinya Ramen Bar has brought back The Red Garnet and curry rice croquettes for a limited time. The Red Garnet is a red vegetable broth featuring pork chashu, spinach, green onion, kikurage, white onion and topped with chili garlic sauce, served with thick noodles for $18. The croquettes are lightly fried, seasoned rice balls stuffed with white cheddar cheese that start at $8. Available until February 28 at all Dallas locations.

Fish City Grill and Half Shells are both offering three chalkboard specials throughout the month. Dishes feature $15 FishWich, with beer-battered haddock fish; $17 chimichurri shrimp tacos; and$24 horseradish Arctic char, served with a Creole mustard cream, buttermilk mashed potatoes and sugar snap peas. The specials are available at all 12 DFW locations and run through December 31.

Grimaldi’s Pizzeria is bringing back its Fire & Spice seasonal menu. New winter dishes include the pepperoni diavolo pizza; the bridge board, an assortment of Italian meats and cheeses, with walnuts, dried cranberries, and oven-roasted Brussels sprouts drizzled with hot honey, served with sliced bread; and white chocolate cheesecake. Cocktails feature the desert pear margarita and Vino’rita, a classic margarita topped with a festive pour of Mille Gradi Sangiovese. Prices range from $7 for the white chocolate cheesecake to $32 for an 18-inch pepperoni diavolo. Available through March 3.

Carrabba's Italian Grill has launched two new full-sized cakes: cannoli cream cake, a vanilla cake with layers of cannoli filling, pistachios, and chocolate sauce with a chocolate chip crust for $64; and strawberry cheesecake, a New York-style cheesecake topped with strawberry puree for $51. Place orders 48 hours prior to pick up or delivery. Available through January 13.

Moxies, the Canadian pub in Uptown, is rolling out limited-time festive cocktails. There are three new drinks, including the Old Fashion Christmas Cocktail with High West Bourbon, cranberry simple syrup, and orange bitters; Peppermint Mocha Martini with a combination of Cafe Borghetti, Ketel One vodka, and peppermint syrup; and Winter Aperol Spritz, with Aperol, Ruffino Prosecco, and Moxies' cranberry syrup. Cocktails are available through January 1.

Dairy Queen has brought back their chicken and dumplings, featuring chicken, gravy, and fluffy dumplings. It comes in three sizes: 12-ounce, 16-ounce, and 32-ounce, available for dine-in, drive thru, and takeout. Chicken and dumplings are available at locations across Dallas-Fort Worth through the end of February.

Rita’s Frozen Custard has two limited-time frozen treats: Peppermint Cold Brew Frozen Coffee with vanilla Italian Ice, frozen custard, cold brew coffee, and a hint of peppermint, topped with whipped cream and crushed peppermint topping; and Peppermint Milkshake with a blend of Vanilla Frozen Custard and crushed peppermint, topped with whipped cream and crushed peppermint topping.

McDonald's brought back its famous McRib on December 3. To celebrate the return, they even launched half-gallon jugs of McRib sauce for those who can't get enough, which is already sold out. The McRib is available through the McDonald's app, in-restaurant and through the drive-thru.

Red Lobster has launched a new menu featuring seven new dishes including Lobster Pappardelle Pasta, Lemon Basil Mahi, bacon Wrapped Scallops, lobster bisque, Parmesan-Crusted Chicken, and Roasted Asparagus, plus the return of fan favorites Popcorn Shrimp and Hush Puppies.

Cinnaholic has launched two holiday rolls flavors and menu items. Holiday rolls feature Nutcracker Sweet, topped with crème brulee frosting, a trio of Bavarian candied almonds, walnuts, and pecans, and dusted with powdered sugar for $6;and Oh Fudge, topped with chocolate frosting, fudgy cookie dough, chocolate bark, homemade chocolate sauce, and holiday sprinkles for $7. Other items include $5 CinnaBites, $4 hot cocoa, and $33 wreath cake, with cinnamon rolls shaped into a wreath. Available through January 6.

Shiner, the Texas-based beer, has a festive brew called Shiner Holiday Cheer with flavor from Texas peaches and pecans for $11 for a six-bottle pack and $19 for a 12-bottle pack. Plus, the 12-pack Home for the Holidays collection goes for $15 and features two new flavors: FM 966, a sweet and spicy ale; and s’more, a dark ale brewed with chocolate & marshmallow with hints of graham cracker and vanilla. Both are available through the end of December.

Yelp featured two Dallas restaurants on this year's 25 Best New Restaurants of 2024 list. Wicked Butcher, the downtown steakhouse, and Casa Pollastro, the Brazilian restaurant in Far North Dallas, both made the cut at no. 6 and 20 respectively. They were two of only four Texas restaurants on the list.

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